struggle comes forth through disobedience

Phil 4:13 I can do all things through Christ which strengthens me. Why is this so hard to understand? The ego loves to get in the way. Satan loves to work through the fears of others. Lord I know what you are guiding me to do, so why do I keep allowing the fear to enter. When I submit to you, others show up and use the same tactics. This is very confusing. For years I understood this as warnings(roadblocks) and I remained put until everyone around me agreed. But this time: I KNOW what needs to be done and I am still struggling. I give you all the doubts and ask for Your protection and guidance especially if I am misunderstanding. Forgive my doubts, they are not in You, they are in my own insecurities that I am not worthy of Your divine wisdom, knowledge and presence. I absolutely positively believe it is You and it has been proven by the removal of Your Grace. THIS IS NOT WORKING AND FEELS LIKE WHAT I IMAGINE HELL TO BE!! I am sorry that I need so much reassurance but You promise that if we ask with pure intention then we will receive. I am asking for Your divine mercy to intercede for YOUR WILL IN MY LIFE. I purely desire to please You alone and have complete faith and trust that this is the only way I can tolerate life itself.

I beg for Your mercy and direction. I believe I am doing what is being asked of me. Forgive my doubts, fears, and weakness. I am nothing without You. I humbly pray for you to support me, reassure me that I am not crazy. Lord I am losing ground and sounding like a babbling fool. How can I serve You this way? I go to your people for answers and there is no one there to answer. I know I am nothing, how can I believe myself? I have to sit here and beg you or sleep until You wake me. I can not do this without You. How can I be so desperate for someone I cant see or touch? I feel like a fool but I can't go back!! It feels like a trap, I don't understand how this works. I just know I have to have You close by. Are you really gonna leave me completely ashamed and empty? I am not angry I am just lost. How am I to learn to follow You if I don't know what to do? Your word shows testing and trials, is this to prove faith in You. Your word says you can read our hearts, then you know I choose You before anything else. I must really have a hard time learning because I don't know what else I need to do. I CHOOSE YOU with or whithout fear, I have no choice but to choose You. Take me Lord if that is what You want. Take whatever You want just don't leave me!!!! Please, Lord You know my heart, I need You. 40 years I am so tired, this never leaves. Please show me what I am doing wrong, please I beg You. I called Your priest You saw me, You know I have been wanting but they always avoid me. I just dont understand. There is nothing I could do to make it different without You leading it, I just dont know enough. I dont assume to know it all, you have not given me this knowledge, how can I change what I dont know?
Satan cant do anything you dont allow him to do. You are all powerful and victorious Lord. What do I do now? I am at your mercy, I cry out to you. Tell me, just tell me, do what you have to do. I am not afraid of anything with You by my side.

So destiny is realized through the tragedy!!

I sit here this morning purely intrigued at how life unfolds. How we start in a perfect tiny bundle and grow into a large awkward package until we are made perfect in Christ. The mindset has everything to do with it. If I keep trying to figure it out or overcome then I continue to struggle. Only when I realize that it will unfold itself on the course do I notice how perfect God's timing is. As my faith and trust grow I become whole and healed. I begin to see how He works and feel connection and liberty. LIBERTY such a beautiful word!! WoW I feel His warm presence from the sunshine, His cleansing from the rain, His breath from the breeze and clarity from His power. What a wonderful powerful almighty soveriegn God I serve!! He is completely trustworthy and merciful~
The captives have been set free. Egypt no longer has power of me and my household. We have claimed the victory and continue forward towards complete wholeness and unity!!

Transition to perfection

This is a great image analogy of my growth in Christ. Life has so much to teach if I choose to remain open to its lessons. Only through His grace may I be in proper alignment towards perfection. I serve a great and mighty sovereign God!! He patiently waits on my return as I patiently wait on His!! Life is better tolerated when I do not try to make it more than it actual is. Yes Christ I will carry my cross also so that I may spend eternity will You!!

Waiting on the answers

Each premature decision I make that haunts me teaches me!! Thank you Lord for giving me the feeling of discontent as an indicator that something just doesnt feel right!! May You strengthen my awareness to recognize this immediately. I thank you for Your almighty protection and patience as I slowly learn.
My desire is to please You as I serve You full heartedly. I ask for assistance with the adjustments of a constantly changing existence. Guide my thoughts to make wise decisions especially in business as I assist You in creating this space of shelter in the world. May we always please You and direct Your people back to you. May they become aware of deception and truth as their eyes are opened. Heavenly Father I ask to help direct Your flock into a life of wholeness and love. May You plant the seed and through Your divine mercy allow us to water and nourish that seed. Only through You shall it grow and produce fruit. Prepare the land O Lord, cultivate, plant and send forth Your resources. Your will be done on earth as it is in Heaven. I anxiously wait on Your Return.

Help me, as the eagles are properly aligned, alert & focused, I wish to be also. My intention always set on pleasing You. My hopes always in You alone. My answers in Your Word. My rest in Your presence. Thank You Lord for Grace and Mercy!!

Time of Harvest

There has been a mighty change in season. I am unworthy of My Lord and Saviour except through His Divine Grace and Mercy. O how thankful I am for His precious blood that has saved the land of Israel. You have heard my deepest desires and brought them to light. These desires You have placed in my soul so that I may seek You in all things. I anxiously wait and hope on the day of Your return. Grant me Your peace mercy and joy as I do Your Will. Father, keep Your hand upon me and protect my soul from evil. Michael, Archangel continue to protect the land of my people. Jesus, Your Divine Presence I hope to be fulfilled with. Until then, may I please and satisfy The Lord Almighty with His Power and Grace poured upon my soul.
Grant Your Divine Mercy upon the land of Your people. Set our Priest, Church, followers, witnesses, lost and saved souls on fire with YOUR MIGHTY POWER!! Grant mercy and protection to All those written in the book of life. I praise You, Most High and Sovereign God!! Today is the day the Lord hath made, may we rejoice and be glad!!

Eagles

Is 40:31 but they who wait for the LORD shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings like eagles; they shall run and not be weary; they shall walk and not faint.
Consider myself fortunate to witness God's beauty and promises. We serve a mighty, merciful God!!

Gifted

God is so good to me!!!! What a powerful faithful trustworthy praiseworthy God. Hold on to faith in Christ no matter what life brings. This is the only thing that really counts!! Learn to stop and listen to the still small voice which guides you continuously. If you are unsure begin testing it with the bible. God will not lead you astray. Jesus is worthy of all thanksgiving and praise and His name carries the most power, by His blood we have been saved. The Holy Spirit is a personal gift to lead and comfort you.

We are unworthy of God's goodness. His Glory outshines anything on earth. His Glory shines through darkness. God provides for all needs, all knowledge and wisdom. If you ask and BELIEVE in His Holy name you WILL receive. Ask for increased faith and His protection against deception. Our eyes must be opened to see. Ask God to give spirit sight!!